Cognitive behavioural therapy, or CBT, looks at connections between situations, thoughts, feelings and actions. It is structured and practical, but it is not simply a demand to think positively.
The details of your life matter here: culture, relationships, health, finances and previous experiences can change what is useful.
Why this can feel difficult
Choosing a therapeutic approach is a conversation, not a test. Different practitioners use different methods, and the useful question is whether the approach fits your goals, preferences, safety and circumstances.
Some experiences worth recognising include:
- A prediction such as “I will fail” can shape avoidance.
- Avoiding something may provide short relief but keep fear going.
- Behaviour and mood can influence each other in both directions.
It is also worth looking at the practical conditions around the problem. Sleep, money, support networks, workload, access needs and physical health can shape how a person copes.
Ideas you can begin with
The following ideas are starting points, not a checklist you have to complete:
- Write down one situation and your first interpretation of it.
- Test whether your thought is a fact or one possible explanation.
- Choose a manageable action that lets you gather new information.
Treat these as options rather than instructions. If an exercise increases distress or creates a safety concern, stop and seek appropriate support.
Exploring this in counselling
In CBT, a trained practitioner collaborates with you on goals, exercises and reviewing what changes. Approaches are adapted to the person and concern.
Before starting, you can ask about qualifications, confidentiality, session length, fees and how progress is reviewed. In Australia, psychologists are registered health practitioners; counsellors have different training and professional arrangements.
When a suggestion feels overwhelming, make it smaller. Breaking a step down or seeking practical help is not the same as avoiding the issue altogether.
Allowing change to happen gradually
Change can be uneven. A hard week does not automatically mean an approach has failed; it may show where an adjustment or extra support is needed.
You might notice that difficult moments take up less room in your day, that you recognise your needs sooner, or that you feel more able to make considered choices. It is worth checking whether a strategy actually improves your life rather than simply making you look as though you are coping.
You are allowed to ask questions about the care you receive.
Something worth asking yourself
What thought feels convincing when you are stressed but less certain later?
You could use that question in a journal, reflect on it while walking, or bring it to a conversation with a professional or someone you trust. You do not have to find the perfect answer immediately. The purpose is to notice what matters and what support may be needed.
Getting further help
Consider reaching out to a GP or qualified mental health professional if the issue continues, intensifies or affects sleep, relationships, work, study or everyday functioning. A professional can help you understand your options and whether further assessment or specialist care is appropriate.
If someone is in immediate danger in Australia, call 000. For crisis support, Lifeline is available on 13 11 14. These services do not replace ongoing assessment or treatment.
Further reading: healthdirect: CBT. This article is general information and is not a diagnosis or a substitute for personal professional advice.
Talk with a Backing U Counsellor
You do not have to work through every challenge on your own. Backing U offers supportive counselling through telehealth appointments by video or phone, as well as in-person sessions at Southport on the Gold Coast.
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For general enquiries, contact assist@backingu.com.au. Counselling is not an emergency or crisis service.