Relationship Conflict Assessment
A detailed private Backing U self-assessment designed to help you reflect on frequency, intensity and impact of conflict, including escalation, unresolved issues, repeated cycles and recovery afterwards. It looks across arguments escalating quickly, the same conflicts repeating without resolution, criticism, defensiveness or contempt during disagreements, withdrawal, shutdown or prolonged silence after conflict and conflict affecting trust, closeness or daily life. The assessment contains 20 questions and is intended to give you a structured wellbeing snapshot, highlight the areas having the greatest effect, and provide practical recommendations for what to do next. It is not designed to diagnose a condition or replace an individual professional assessment.
The Relationship Conflict Assessment is a Backing U educational wellbeing and self-reflection tool. It is not a validated diagnostic instrument, does not provide a clinical diagnosis and does not replace individual assessment or advice from a qualified professional. Scores are influenced by how questions are understood and by the timeframe selected. If several items are marked N/A, the total may be lower and should be interpreted cautiously; individual responses may be more informative than the total score. If difficulties are severe, rapidly worsening, affecting basic functioning or creating safety concerns, seek appropriate professional or urgent support. External resources are provided for further reading and support only. They are operated by independent Australian or UK organisations and their inclusion does not imply endorsement of this Backing U tool.
I have noticed arguments escalating quickly.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Arguments escalating quickly has been difficult to ignore, switch off or manage once it starts.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Arguments escalating quickly has affected my concentration, mood, sleep, relationships, responsibilities or usual routine.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have changed, delayed, avoided or pushed through things because of arguments escalating quickly.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have noticed the same conflicts repeating without resolution.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
The same conflicts repeating without resolution has been difficult to ignore, switch off or manage once it starts.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
The same conflicts repeating without resolution has affected my concentration, mood, sleep, relationships, responsibilities or usual routine.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have changed, delayed, avoided or pushed through things because of the same conflicts repeating without resolution.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have noticed criticism, defensiveness or contempt during disagreements.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Criticism, defensiveness or contempt during disagreements has been difficult to ignore, switch off or manage once it starts.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Criticism, defensiveness or contempt during disagreements has affected my concentration, mood, sleep, relationships, responsibilities or usual routine.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have changed, delayed, avoided or pushed through things because of criticism, defensiveness or contempt during disagreements.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have noticed withdrawal, shutdown or prolonged silence after conflict.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Withdrawal, shutdown or prolonged silence after conflict has been difficult to ignore, switch off or manage once it starts.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Withdrawal, shutdown or prolonged silence after conflict has affected my concentration, mood, sleep, relationships, responsibilities or usual routine.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have changed, delayed, avoided or pushed through things because of withdrawal, shutdown or prolonged silence after conflict.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have noticed conflict affecting trust, closeness or daily life.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Conflict affecting trust, closeness or daily life has been difficult to ignore, switch off or manage once it starts.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Conflict affecting trust, closeness or daily life has affected my concentration, mood, sleep, relationships, responsibilities or usual routine.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
I have changed, delayed, avoided or pushed through things because of conflict affecting trust, closeness or daily life.
Choose 0 if this has not applied and 10 if it has applied extremely strongly, frequently or consistently during the stated timeframe. Use N/A only if the question is genuinely not relevant.
Keep or share a copy of your result
You can email a copy of this result to yourself. You can separately choose whether Backing U may receive an anonymous copy of your responses and result for quality improvement and research.
The Relationship Conflict Assessment is a Backing U educational wellbeing and self-reflection tool. It is not a validated diagnostic instrument, does not provide a clinical diagnosis and does not replace individual assessment or advice from a qualified professional. Scores are influenced by how questions are understood and by the timeframe selected. If several items are marked N/A, the total may be lower and should be interpreted cautiously; individual responses may be more informative than the total score. If difficulties are severe, rapidly worsening, affecting basic functioning or creating safety concerns, seek appropriate professional or urgent support. External resources are provided for further reading and support only. They are operated by independent Australian or UK organisations and their inclusion does not imply endorsement of this Backing U tool.